How I work

“Integrative” means I don’t use just one approach. I’ve got a whole toolbox that informs how we work together.

As an integrative counsellor, I blend together approaches from a wide variety of psychotherapeutic models and schools of thought including:

Buddhist, mindfulness and compassion based therapies (i.e. the RAIN approach by Tara Brach); Acceptance and Commitment Therapy; person centred counselling; Internal Family Systems (IFS or parts work ; somatic therapy; neuroscience; evolutionary biology; Gestalt and Structural Dissociation Theory.

What this means for you:

These approaches blend together in infinitely creative ways but here are some of the main headlines:

I have an implicit trust in your power, your choice and your ability to grow and change over time.

You will be deeply valued as a whole human being, not a reductive collection of symptoms or behaviours or pathologies.

We recognise that life can be painful and uncertain whilst appropriately honouring losses, as well as giving expression to grief, anger, resentment, powerlessness and rage. 

My approach understands that the innate survival biology we’ve inherited from our wild past meshes badly with the super-abundant conditions of modern life ie. our dopamine reward systems. 

A perspective that creates space for all the parts of you (even the ones you thoroughly hate), improving your relationship with yourself and developing a spirit of acceptance which is paradoxically the foundation for change. 

An acknowledgement that traumatic experiences can leave us feeling fragmented, and with a journey of recovering and bringing those parts of ourselves back together.

A belief that you can’t hate yourself into the best version of yourself.

At the end of the day, therapy produces real conversations about the things that really matter in our lives. 

If all of that seems a bit complex to understand, don’t worry. You don’t need to read up on anything or learn the different approaches a counsellor uses. All you have to do is choose a counsellor who just feels like a good fit for you. That’s all.

What issues do I work with?

I work with adults online by Zoom and I have some face to face appointments at my office in Exeter, Devon. By no means an exhaustive list, here are some of the concerns I’ve talked with clients about: 

  • Depression
  • Anxiety
  • Anger
  • Self-hate
  • Low self worth and low self esteem
  • Hopelessness
  • Despair
  • Grief & loss of all kinds
  • Bereavement
  • Loss of purpose and meaning
  • Changing your relationship with alcohol
  • Changing your relationship with recreational drugs
  • Masculinity
  • Femininity
  • Sexuality (lesbian, gay, bisexual, non–binary, pansexual, asexual)
  • Historical childhood neglect and abuse
  • Neurodivergence
  • Porn addiction
  • Gender Identity
  • Polyamorous relationships
  • Secret non- monogamy
  • Recovery from coercive and controlling relationships
  • Gaming addiction
  • Compulsive behaviours 
  • The life impact of chronic life limiting health conditions

We work with the uncomfortable stuff to get to the good stuff.

We don’t just talk about the bad stuff. We also talk about aiming for more of the good stuff, because that’s what we really want at the end of the day, right? 

  • Joy
  • Love
  • Connection
  • Peace
  • Contentment
  • Tranquility
  • Recovery
  • Ease
  • Relief 
  • Meaning and purpose
  • Excitement
  • Hopefulness

Sex & Kink Positive

Whilst I am not a sex therapist, I am kink informed, and aware of sexual diversity issues across the spectrum including asexuality and alternative relationship styles such as polyamory with an accepting and non-judgemental outlook. 

I do not currently offer couples or group counselling.